Quite a character

I love this picture of Isaac! :)

Isaac's quite a character. He has certain quirks which I used to put down to him acting his age. But now, having another two kids, I can see how all three are different in their own way, and it can sometimes be very presumptuous to say kids behave in a certain way coz they are "at that age". Also, having spoken with lots of mummies lately, they also tell me that not all the kids Isaac's age, behaves the way he does.

I am referring to how he is a very structured boy who seems to be a stickler for rules, and how things "should be". Also, I call him Mr Preempter because I need to preempt  him about how certain events will take place (say, our plans for the day), and not just spring it on him last minute or change our plans without warning, coz that will upset him. We have to remind ourselves of this so that we can prepare him so as not to upset him.

 

We just experienced it on Monday. Hubbs and I decided to take Monday off to convert this past weekend into a super long Labour Day weekend. We wanted to take the kids on an urban adventure. Instead of driving out like we normally do, we took the kids on the train instead. I'd do a separate post on this urban adventure with the pix we took that day. But for this post, I wish to talk about Isaac.

He asked me:"Mummy, which stop are we taking the train to?" And I told him "City Hall" coz initially, we thought of taking the train to City Hall, and then walk to the Art Museum. Then, hubbs had a better idea. He said:"Why don't we take the train to Raffles Place, so that we can walk across the bridge, along the river, and still walk to the Art Museum?" Unfortunately, in our haste to decide (the train was moving very quickly and stops were passing us by), we did not stop to consult with Isaac and convince him of our decision. We simply forced our decision on him, and we said "Now, we're going to Raffles Place instead."
Isaac threw a huge tantrum. He was very upset that we'd changed our minds on the spur of the moment.

Me:"We're going to stop at Raffles Place instead of City Hall, Isaac."
Isaac:"Huh?! But I want to go to City Hall! and the Museum!"
Me:"Yes yes, we're still going to the same Museum. Just that we'd stop at Raffles Place. We can walk along the river and you can cycle your balance bike. It's very nice."
Isaac:"But just now you said we're going to City Hall. So I want to go City Hall."
Me:"Er, yah, that was just now. But now we have decided to stop at Raffles Place. It's just one stop before City Hall. Very near."
Isaac:"No, I want to go to City Hall!"
Me:"Why do you want to go to City Hall? What difference does it make? We're still going to the same Museum."
Isaac:"You said we're going to City Hall, then now you say no City Hall. You're telling lies."
Me:"No, I'm not telling lies. I'm saying we have changed our plans and decided to walk from Raffles Place instead of City Hall. Okay, I tell you what, we'd walk from Raffles Place to City Hall, okay?"
Isaac:"No, I want to go to City Hall FIRST."
Me"What difference is it to you?! You've never even been to City Hall before?!"

Isaac @ 4 years 7 months | March 2012

This incident put Isaac in a horrid mood and he sulked all the way as we walked around Raffles Place and found a place to have lunch. In his bid to spite us, he said:"Hummpph, I don't want to eat lunch. I'm not hungry." This was the first time he'd threatened not to eat for the sake of throwing a tantrum and we were really getting quite annoyed with him. So hubbs gave him more warnings to stop his obnoxious behaviour. When he still persisted, hubbs smacked him a huge one on his bum. He cried, cried some more, asked for me, but hubbs made him stand in a corner for awhile before asking him to apologise for his horrid behaviour; then was he allowed to come let me hug and comfort him.

Me:"Isaac... please choose to be happy. This should be a good day, right? Mummy and Papa bring you, Asher & Shawna out, we take the train, we go gai-gai... Choose to be happy. You enjoyed the train ride, didn't you? *He nods* So, be happy that you got to take the train. Enjoy yourself. Don't choose to be upset over little things and things that are not important. Don't black face, okay?"
Isaac:"I never black face."
Me:"Is it? I'm looking at your face and it's very black."
Isaac:"This is angry face. It is not black face."
Me:"Angry face IS black face lah!"
Isaac:"Oh. You didn't tell me that angry face is called black face."
Me:"Okay so now you know. So... no black face,okay? Please choose to be happy? Mummy wants you to be happy and have fun. Not have angry black face and be upset all day. Okay? Please?"
Isaac:"Okay Mummy."

And so, after the spanking episode, Isaac decided to be happy, and he was. He gradually lost his black face over eating his spaghetti, and he started enjoying the rest of the day. In order to pacify his need to go to City Hall, we decided to walk there. So we told Isaac, we'd walk to City Hall. But on our way there, we made plans to meet up with another family in Sentosa, to bring the kids to the beach to play sand. With the morning's episode still fresh in my mind, I went to talk to Isaac.

Me:"Isaac... do you want to go to the beach?"
Isaac:"Yes..."
Me:"Okay, so shall we not go to City Hall now? Shall we take a taxi car to the beach?"
Isaac:"But I want to go to City Hall. You said we're walking to City Hall."
Me:"Yes, I did say that. Hmmm... do you want to see Brandon? (our friends' son, same age as Isaac)"
Isaac:"Yes. But I want to go to City Hall first."
Me:"Riiight. But Brandon is going to the beach now, you know. We can go City Hall another time. Now, we take a taxi car to go to the beach to meet Brandon there. How about that?"
Isaac:"You will forget to go to City Hall."
Me:"No, I won't. Another day, we go. Now, we go to the beach, alright?"
Isaac:"Oh alright."

And there was no fuss. We took a cab to Sentosa, and had lots of fun the rest of the day without anymore tantrums from Isaac. And so I joked with hubbs:"Your son is the "consultative type" - must consult him and get his agreement; cannot force our decision on him!" :)