Last Sunday, we went to our friend's place for a rockclimbing session. Our friend, Chee Beng, a rockclimbing enthusiast has a rockclimbing wall installed on the side of his corner terrace home. So he and his family welcomes us over anytime to climb his wall. Being a rockclimbing enthusiast himself, hubbs is happy to oblige and drop by to climb.
Below is our Isaac, trying to climb the wall. A half meter higher (than in the picture) is about as far as he got that day. It was his third time climbing a wall. He tried a few times on Sunday, but I don't think he made it to the top. We tried to console ourselves that "he's inexperienced" and "he's just a little boy". But our friends, Chan Peng and Xiaofeng's sons, just put that theory to rest.
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| Photo collage courtesy of Hay & Yu's parents' Chan Peng & Xiaofeng |
The boy above in red is Yu, he is 4 years old this year. And Sunday was his first time climbing a rockclimbing wall. And look, he made it to the top! Below, the boy in white, is Yu's older brother - Hay, who is 6 years old this year. Also his first time climbing, and he managed to scale the entire wall too. As you can see, these boys aren't exactly mini Ironmans or anything like that. Yu is average in size, and Hay is one of the scrawniest 6 year old boys I have ever seen, and yet, they could do it. They scaled the wall.
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| Photo collage courtesy of Hay & Yu's parents' Chan Peng & Xiaofeng |
Isaac, on the other hand, kept saying things like "I cannot do it." "I can't I can't", and gave up a bit too easily. Looking back, I wasn't surprised, as Isaac is the type that has to have a lot of early success in order to bolster his confidence into persevering and doing well. This extends to other parts of his life. Just that it is in this instance, that it brought this aspect out so starkly.
Discussing this with hubbs, it triggered another discussion on an issue which was lingering at the back of our minds. Isaac starts primary school in 2 years time, you see. And hubbs being a Catholic High School (Pri & Sec) alumni, Isaac would have priority to get into Catholic High Primary School. Our problem is that it's sooooo far from where we are currently staying, so we are thinking twice about sending Isaac there. It seems a fightful waste not to send him to such a good school though.
But now, this discussion triggered a thought. Isaac is a very bright boy and from what we can see, he is above average amongst his peers. But, given his character, perhaps Isaac would fare better if he were placed in an average school where he is amongst the top-performers; rather than go to a good school like Catholic High, and he average there. Hmmmm... food for thought... we have one year to decide where to register him for...
Note: Photo-collages were used with approval. They first appeared at the Chans' blog here!
Research shows that kids born in the early part of the year perform better than kids born in the later part of the year. If I had kids, I'd give my kids the best fighting chance they had to be ahead and stay ahead.
ReplyDeleteI would go as far as enrolling my kids a year later than other kids. So what if they're a year older? They're also a year wiser. In the grand scheme of things, kids grow so quickly at that age, both physically and mentally. They'll have a huge head start, in studies (brain development), sports (physiological development).
I say put him in a average school where he can shine. Confidence goes a long way as an adult and cannot be build up easily. Its much easier to humble a proud man than to teach a self doubting man to have confidence in self.
As a young student, I flunked through school and only got into the swing of things when I hung out with peers a year my junior who were less mature and potentially less "developed". I wouldn't call it a huge gain, but it was precisely this difference that helped me develop my character and leadership.
Feng
Thanks for your comments, Feng! We're talking to a lot of friends, and we do hear from people who feel the same way you do. Hence the dilemma - coz we believe you guys!
DeleteFrom what you share about Issac and how he excels in the games you play, he's an extremely intelligent child!
ReplyDeleteLike your friend, I also did very badly in school and only found my footing in Poly. Everyone is different, but it's a shame that the method of assessment in pri and sec schools is the same, thus many innocent kids (like me!) are branded 'average' or worse, until we realise that we're better in other things and start to feel good about ourselves many years down the road, after having recovered from the initial branding
Chin up, you've got a great boy!!
Hey Adora, thanks! :) We hope to ultimately make the correct decision on where to enroll him! :p
DeleteAgree! E will be in P1 next year and we'll be enrolling him in an average school though there's a prestigious one less than one km away.
ReplyDeleteI noticed that he was motivated only when he did well. And he is the kind who does not thrive under pressure but excels with lots of affirmation.
Sports does bring out aspects of the child's personality starkly. For us, it was through rollerblading that we saw clearly his temperament. Tempted to go for this but unsure about our schedule as yet ...
Yeah, I'm kinda leaning on the average school too, for this reason. Plus it's so far... haha I think I shall do a full blog post on this issue! Next week! :)
DeletePam,
ReplyDeleteI say go with your gut feel. Maternal instincts are there for a lot of reasons. :)
But yes - I agree that confidence is a very important foundation. Without it, so what if you excel in school? School won't last forever, life does.
True, true! I shall share more on my thoughts about this issue in a post next week! :)
DeletePam best to consider what your son's interest are in and which school can best help him develop his talents at the pace which is comfortable for him. Branded school may not be the best choice if there are transportation issues and high stress levels.
ReplyDelete